Instill self-confidence and self-esteem among struggling students

#2 | Tuesday, October 8, 2019, 16:33:38 | Comments: 0
anxiety counselling Brisbane they have already developed a tangible sense of the type of student they belong to, what they are supposed to and cannot achieve, and that is something I encounter every day. The common conversation you had with students entering the exam goes as follows:

Instill self-confidence and self-esteem among struggling students

The school can be very difficult to self-image students, and quickly classify themselves as a person "bad at math" or "student D". As an assistant teacher in high school learning, I see it every day. By the time they enroll in high school, anxiety counselling Brisbane they have already developed a tangible sense of the type of student they belong to, what they are supposed to and cannot achieve, and that is something I encounter every day. The common conversation you had with students entering the exam goes as follows:




"I've got this, you'll do a great job!" I say loudly.


"Miss Kara I will fail, I already know" they say loudly not excited.


"Wrong! Retrieve that and tell me you will do what you can!"


I am often shocked by how much they struggle to say that they may have a chance to pass as it breaks my heart. I can assure you that I don't leave this student until they look at me and say something like "I'll try my best" or "I'll order." Even if they didn't believe it, they said it was the first step.


The role of parents

As a parent, you play a pivotal role in instilling the self-confidence and self-esteem of your children. They often do not believe in themselves, so they need their faith in them. School competitiveness makes it very easy for children to lose confidence and self-belief. This may serve as a protection mechanism, so defining the expectation of failure protects against disappointment by getting a “I knew” response when they receive a bad score. Although disappointment may still be somewhat deep-rooted, it is able to maintain a strong "carefree" interface. This expectation is a self-fulfilling prophecy, or a belief or expectation that an individual carries about a future event that arises because the individual carries it. On the other hand, if they think they can go through, their behavior will start to reverse, and they will start working towards it.



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What they need from you is to tell them that you believe in them, that their marks do not identify them and that you will love them no matter what marks they come at home. “You may already know this,” you might think, but you will be surprised by the process of thinking about the disaster some children experience when they fail, especially if this is the first time. The headmaster said it was best in a letter sent home to parents during the exam period, "Tell them, no matter how much they score, you love them and you won't judge them. Please do so, and when you do, watch your children conquer the world." The rest of the message is below.

Top 5 Tips

Here are some tips to help boost your children's self-confidence and self-esteem:


  1. Praise the effort, not the mark - let them know that you appreciate the effort they put into their work rather than the actual mark.
  2. Praise the behavior, not the adjective - instead of saying "you're too smart", something that they seem to be unable to change, say something like "you're a hard worker."
  3. Celebrate the little things - did they get B at HPE but failed in mathematics? At least they are a wonderful athlete! Students need to experience success, because continuous failure becomes exhausting, and after a while, I see many students fall into a helpless, unwilling and unpaid mindset that is really hard to get out of.
  4. Talk to them about failure - make it clear that failure is not a bad thing, but it is actually a wonderful learning curve. Discuss the times when you might have experienced a failure (for example, when trying a new recipe that is paused) but it was good because you learned from your mistakes. Students are often surprised when they ask me a question and I replied: "I don't know, let's take a look at the textbook and work on it together." Sometimes they make a mistake, and they have to correct what they love!
  5. Help them set realistic goals - getting A in every subject may not be possible, but C may be possible. Support them in setting reasonable and achievable goals that will help avoid feelings of failure.


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